Lennox Lewis, the undisputed heavyweight boxing champion of the world, recently challenged former world savior Ness to a title fight. Lewis called Ness out, stating “Ness thinks he’s so tough, well he’s never gone against the undisputed champ. I’ve already taken everyone out. Roy Jones Jr.? Please, don’t waste my time with that chump. ... Ness, it’s time to put up or shut up.”

After knocking out heavyweights Mike Tyson, Hashim Rahman and Vitali “Dr. Iron Fist” Klitcshko, the undisputed champion has gone through a dry spell, going as long as a year without a fight. He spent the time off offering fights to local Eagleland heavyweights, with undisputed success. Lewis, 37, has faced constant rumors of retirement since his matches against Rahman and isn’t in the condition he was earlier in his career. SO LEWIS IS GETTING SCHOOLED, GO NESS GO. Despite his aging and condition, Lewis has been able to keep his undisputed title and hasn’t faced much competition.

If Ness were to accept this fight, he would earn up to $8 million, but showed little interest when questioned about the earnings. Ness showed little interest in the event itself, but boxing analysts are eagerly awaiting his response. Analyst David Manning stated, “Boxing is in bad shape, just like Lennox Lewis. Oh snap, you got zinged, Lennox, you got zinged good.” After laughing continuously at his joke, Manning added, “This match would bring lots of much-needed publicity to boxing. Nobody knows these guys anymore. Who was Klitschko? I still don’t know but he put up one heck of a fight. People know Ness. He’s no boxer, but he’s right for the sport.”

Lewis is expected to end his career after one last fight and everyone is waiting to see if his final fight will be against Ness. The fight is expected to take place in either Las Vegas or Fourside. Fourside last played host to a heavyweight title fight in 1965, when Muhammad Ali beat on Jackie, local bar owner, until he knocked his eye out. Dude, that was nasty, you remember that? I knew Ali would win but man, that was just a savage beating. Anyways, Emanuel Steward, Lewis’s trainer stated that Lewis is in excellent shape and thinks “Ness will be out cold by the third round. Vitali “Dr. Iron Fist” Klitcshko was the biggest man to ever face Lennox and Ness is undisputedly the smallest. He doesn’t even have a cool nickname like Vitali “Dr. Iron Fist” Klitcshko.”

Lewis, of London, England, is 15-2-1 in world title fights, not counting all those Onett fights he did for fun. Ness, of Onett, Eagleland, is 1-0-0 in world saving attempts. If Lewis gains superpowers and begins a world domination campaign, Ness is expected to accept the challenge without question.